THE New Year for many is the time to make positive resolutions and to start life afresh.
For others it can be a lonely and desperate time after all the fun and festivities of the Christmas period are over.
The 125 volunteers at Chester Samaritans know this all too well.
That is because the centre, on Upper Northgate Street, receives more than 36,400 calls per year – no more so than in the ‘January blues’ period.
Samaritan volunteer Richard said: “Christmas time can be lonely for some people but they are in the spirit of things and it tends to be the New Year when suddenly all the goodwill and the visits stop when people tend to feel it.
“The thought of a New Year of some people is a time for renewal, but for others it can drag them down, the thought of a whole year ahead of them and they feel hopeless.”
One of the centre’s cases this time last year was a woman who was in an abusive relationship.
She had tried to leave a number of times but never had the strength to go.
Richard said: “She apologised when she rang up – said she had never called before and didn’t know what to do.
“She didn’t know where to start or what to say, but I told her to tell me how she felt and two hours later we were still on the phone.”
The woman had a relative with cancer, and she had had a miscarriage.
He added: “She had a bad day at work and all of it got too much – she just said she was so glad she was able to talk.”
Richard and the team in Chester are not advisers, counsellors or therapists, just kind-hearted volunteers “trained in the art of listening”.
Samaritans volunteers undergo seven weeks of training and monitoring before they start taking calls from the public.
They are always supported by a shift leader who will allow them invaluable debriefing time after any call.
“We give people time – the opportunity to talk and time to empty their heads when it feels like a washing machine,” added Richard, who has been a volunteer for 30 years.
“People have trouble thinking straight and often they can’t talk to their families or friends because they don’t want to burden them.”
And those people, said Richard, can be from all walks of life – from barristers to students to homeless people – their ears are open to anyone without judgement.
He added: “Humans have a capacity and they can cope with certain things but when the capacity is at its maximum, they can’t take anymore.
“Often it’s the straw that broke the camel’s back.
“They call and say ‘this is going to sound really stupid’, but they don’t sound stupid to us. They are just normal people with too much on top of them.”
The charity has strong links with services for drug and alcohol misuse, domestic abuse, mental health and counselling and can refer callers if they request it.
However, callers always remain anonymous unless they willingly give their details.
Samaritans in Chester also have links to the email (jo@samaritans.org) and SMS services, as well as face-to-face contact at the centre (from 10am to 10pm each day) and via the telephone on 01244 377999/0845 790 9090, so that 24 hours a day people can call in.
Case study
John rang the centre in Chester on a dark, cold and miserable winter night.
He said he’d been made redundant after working for the same firm for 20 years.
At his age he didn’t feel he’d ever get another job.
He felt he was over the hill and no one would want him.
He was proud that he’d been with the same firm for so long.
His marriage had broken down and he was going through a prolonged and bitter divorce.
He’d been accused of doing all sorts of nasty things to his wife.
The worst, he felt, was that she’d accused him of hitting her, which he swore, choking back tears, was a lie.
He was very distressed that his gas, water, electric and phone bills were unpaid and he’d fallen behind with his mortgage.
He’d tried to talk to his mortgage company but they wouldn’t listen. That day he’d received a letter from them threatening repossession.
He’d had enough and wanted out. No job, no home, no future, no hope. So no life.
He wanted to die. John said he’d taken enough pills to end it all but refused the offer of an ambulance being called for him.
During the conversation John had mentioned that his daughter was due home later. He stayed on the phone angry and crying, shouting and sobbing ”life isn’t fair,
I just wanna die”.
As John had agreed for us to tell his daughter he’d taken an overdose when she got home we told her. She called an ambulance and he was rushed to A&E.
We learned some time later that John recovered from the overdose and agreed to have some counselling. Sadly he did lose his house but went on to find another job.
We don’t always hear how our callers get on but can and do offer on-going support if they need it.